Today, anger seems to be everpresent in our lives: in our daily conmute to and from work, at school, at work, while servicing customers, and sometimes at home from someone that we love. Although I am not an expert in human behavior, I am going to talk about how to respond to anger from my point of view based on seventeen years of working as a crew leader for a state university. Part of my job description required to assign work and supervise the completion of the assigned work of my subordinates. I had to deal with unhappy people very often and our department trained us to deal with conflict on the workplace. It is useful to develop strategies to deal with this kind of situation because we may never know when we are going to be dealing with someone's outburst.
Step 1: Why Sometimes We Get Angry?
- Learned behavior.If someone is born with parents and siblings that react angrily to any provocation, there is a great chance that the individual will grow up to be an angry adult.
- Stress. We may feel like a pressure cooker, boiling inside until we burst in anger.
- Psychiatric disorders. People suffering from depression or bipolar disorder sometimes experience irritability and may react with anger to perceived threats.
- Intimidation. Some people use anger to manipulate others into doing their bidding. Psychopaths have no conscience and they enjoy having power over people. They resort to threats, intimidation, manipulation, and agression to get what they want. Stay away from these kind of individuals, document and report to authorities incidents like these for your own protection and others.
Step 2: What to Do When Someone Is Angry at Us?
There are many things we can do when dealing with an angry person:
- Do not respond with anger. Resist the temptation of paying with the same token. By keeping yourself in control you will not feed the emotional fire. It is much better to keep quiet than making an explosive situation worst. The same can be said if you encounter an aggressive driver: Do not put yourself or others in danger by using your vehicle to punish the offending driver.
- Ask questions in a calm manner. Anger is an emotion, when you ask questions you force the angry person to think, when we think our emotions subside. Instead of accusing the other person of being wrong, ask questions with the word "I". It works! An example would be "I understand that you are upset. It's there anything that I could do to help?"
- Keep a distance or move yourself from the area. If possible, remove yourself from the vicinity of the angry coworker until the person cools off.
- Do not tolerate abuse. Do not become a victim. Report aggressive behavior immediately to the supervisor, manager, school principal, police, or human resources staff. In many states and countries management is liable for the damages that occurr at the workplace.
Step 3: How We Deal With Our Own Anger?
- Talk to a friend, relative, spiritual counselor, mental health professional, or anyone willing to listen.
- Breathing exercises.
- Hobbies! And this is where Instructables comes in.
- Involve yourself in activities where you can experience flow , activities that serve not only to relax you but, also will give you a sense of satisfaction.